Archive for November, 2008

11/18/08

November 18, 2008 at 4:36 pm · Filed under God, Jesus, kids, motherhood, writing

My husband will call or email me sometime during the day most days. Yesterday he asked how I was doing and I just told him I was tired but otherwise okay. Well, he proceeded to mumble something about me always being tired.

I guess I can’t lie to myself and tell myself I am not tired because I am. It’s a pretty tough job to take care of our family, home, and also workand go to school. Honestly, I am tired. However, I have a new goal. My goal is to tell him, and myself, that I am doing just fine. In all seriousness I am doing just fine. I have a wonderful husband, great kids, we are healthy, we have a home, insurance, jobs, education, transportation, Internet, games, movies, books, clothes…we have SO MUCH! So what if I am tired! I am blessed. All that I need are the basics and God gives me so much more. If all I have put on my plate, or the job that God has called me to do, leaves me tired then good! I am glad to be tired because it means I am blessed to have everything I have. I am more tired of being a winey baby and overweight than I am physically tired.

I am not tired. I am blessed.

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11/16/08

November 16, 2008 at 2:25 pm · Filed under Uncategorized

I spent all last week really resenting being a mom. I was fed up with the driving, the homework, talking with teachers, getting everyone to sports, and doing it all while my husband works nights, so in other words…alone. Do I truly resent him or the kids? No. But last week was a tough week and I was just so tired. I bet you everyday I said, in my mind, that I just wanted to quit.

I am better now. Yesterday I turned in the last of my finals so I have a two week break. Last night I was invited to a little “party” at the last minute, which I enjoyed very much (I even did some singing!), and today is the last night of my daughter’s musical so my gas usuage should be cut in half. Later today we are taking the kids to a concert and then the week starts all over tomorrow but with so much less on my plate.

I have been feeling fat lately and playing the part well: overeating at any opportunity I have. I am hopeful that with some stressors cleared out of the way that I can hop back on that horse again so I don’t feel like a big walking talking tub of lard. Tired is the only word I can think of that could possibly describe how I have felt lately.

Tired, resentful, fed up, exhausted but blessed, loved, and needed and somehow God gives me more than enough to keep on going. God will forever amaze me and I thank Him for the forgiveness I need and get when there are days when I throw my hands at Him and complain. I have been complaining a lot lately.

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